Dear Mom who is Ready to Quit

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Dear Mom who is ready to quit,

I have been there. In fact I was there today. I was ready to throw up my hands and exclaim,

I quit! You win. I am to tired to fight anymore.

I have been there when the day doesn’t go as planned. You even gave up a precious hour of sleep so you could sneak some quiet time alone before the chaos of your day starts. Even with the head start you still can’t seem to get ahead.

Your house is a disaster, there is a never-ending pile of laundry, that when you finally reach the bottom of, it regenerates and you are back to the beginning. Then there are the dishes, pretty much the same story as the laundry.

My dishes seem to multiply even though I don’t buy anymore.

The never-ending needs of kids and husband can wear you out. They can make you feel like the 5 min shower you took 3 days ago was selfish because it meant that you weren’t spending time with the family.

Then you score a play-date at a friends house that is spotless. Looking around you start to question how good of a mom/wife you are. Why is it so easy for your friend to keep a spotless house but you struggle to keep clean clothes on your kids and your teeth brushed?

While at that play-date the talk to turns to parenting, as all conversations do with moms. Numerous topics are thrown around, feeding, leaps, successes, discipline, what works for any of those and what are gigantic fails.

We all have failed.

Listening to other mothers can be helpful but it can also cause the voice in your head to go crazy. Even if you know that you have done your best, there is always that thought, ‘Did I really do it right?’

I hear that voice everyday, for every parenting choice I have ever made.

Did I really try hard enough?

Did I give up to soon?

Is it really worth the fight?

Could I have done something different to make the outcome better?

Only you can answer those questions.

I ask those questions everyday. I am a mom that questions everything. I research everything. I cry at night thinking about what I could have done different. I have been there. I am there.

I can assure you that you are not alone. You are not alone in your insecurity. You are not alone in feeling like you are alone. You are not alone in the fact that your family questions what you do as a parent. You are not alone in feeling like the world, including your children, are against you.

It is daunting to be a mom. It is scary when those around you question your every decision, not counting your own quiet voice wondering if that should have been done.

Know that you are not alone.

The thing is, it isn’t all bad! It is so easy to get stuck on the hard things. So easy to forget what it felt like to hold your child for the first time.

aydenandiOr the smiles that you get when you feed them. They don’t care if you breastfed or formula fed. All they want is the food. Doesn’t matter if it came out of a jar or off your plate.

feedingIt is about your effort. Your effort to make their lives the best that you can.

Don’t quit dear mom. You are doing amazing. Shake off this bad day. Tomorrow is a new day. Make it a great day. And if you ever struggle again, remember, you are not alone!

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8 thoughts on “Dear Mom who is Ready to Quit

  1. Well said. Great advice and being one who helps other people get organized for a living, if you’re house isn’t spotless and completely organized, you are not alone.

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  2. What an amazing letter to all moms out there! I just shared these thoughts with other mommy friends last night. It’s so true – tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it. (Thank you, Anne of Green Gables!) I shared your post on FB and Twitter.

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